Bring That Mickey Mouse Wildcat Offense!

Um, not sure why I'm talking any sort of shit about an opposing team's offense considering the porous body of work that the B'cos "D" has exhibited up to now, but if we can't stop some high school scheme run by the Miami Dolphins (weren't they almost winless last season?), this might even be a bigger disgrace than I had imagined. No Champ? Could be big trouble, but I'm rolling the dice and saying 30-10 B'cos.

Maybe this confidence can be chalked up to my impending trip to Invesco with ST. Great weather, beer, Shannon Sharpe jerseys? What more do you want?!?!?

How Badly Are You Going Through Avs Goal Withdrawals?

As a 3rd period post, I'm hoping this is an anti-jinx. But, the offense seems to be sputtering heavily after the early-season rampage. This is a total of 2 goals now through the last 8 periods. That ain't cutting it, dudes. Raycroft is also cementing his position on the bench. Home loss to the B-Jacks? Glad that wasn't part of my 14-game plan.

What the hell?

I'll admit that this has absolutely nothing to do with sports whatsoever. It has to be reported because I just can't believe this happened.
Scene: A patio at a bar in north Denver. It is around 4:45pm as the two men are seated.
Waiter: What would you like to drink?
Man 1: I think I'll have a Fat Tire.
Waiter: Great, and you?
Man 2: I'll have a Pabst.
Waiter: A what?
Man 2: A Pabst?
Waiter: What is that?
Man 2: A Pabst Blue Ribbon. It's a beer.
Waiter: We don't have that.
Man 2: What are those guys drinking over there? (Points at a table full of people drinking cans of Pabst Blue Ribbon) Did they bring those in themselves?
Waiter: Oh... that's a PBR. Would you like one of those?
Man 2: Uh... yeah.

Avs on a bit of a tear

Imagine if the Avs hadn't blown those first 3 games...

Nice to see Jesus...erm, I mean Lappy get on the scoresheet last night. The 16th different Avs player to net a goal this year. This team likes to score.

As much as I like to hate on Budaj (actually I don't) it's very key to see him rebound from his shaky start and have a truly solid game. If he can keep that up and this team continues to score in bunches, the Avs might be more of a player in the West than just about anybody predicted.

You sons of bitches better believe someone is going to die for that disgrace last night! The Rat will not rest. Believe me, I have access to Andre Hall's home address.
I know where the defense goes for their "bonding dinners". I'm not quite sure who our wretched D-coordinator is, but can likely find out with a few phone calls. You've been warned.

Hold On To the Ball Please

Two fumbles in the first quarter by Andre Hall. What is the old adage about turnovers on the road? Oh yeah, you don't win many games when you lose the turnover battle. Not a good start to this one...

Farewell to thee

Beer drinkers of the world may stand up and rejoice. Zima is no more. Miller-Coors has pulled the plug on this horrible beverage. I can't tell you how many times I switched to soft drinks instead of Zima when the party's host or hostess ran out of beer. Now if we could just do something about that Hard Mike's Lemonade crap. Is it Hard Mike's or Mike's Hard Lemonade? Whatever... that stuff has to go too.

Annoyed By Zero

This post might belong on BSB, as I believe my grievance has origins in watching baseball playoffs, but KTH is where where it's at these days.

So, I used to kind of like the song, "Saved by Zero" by the Fixx. It's a pretty catchy tune with a solid guitar riff that wasn't too "80's Top 40" sounding. That opinion of the song has been completely reversed in the last couple of weeks by the onslaught of commercials feature said song/jingle. While I still couldn't tell you what the ad was for (I'm pretty good at tuning that information out while having the tv on), I involuntarily taught myself the guitar part to the song.


Also, I'm beginning to detest "Space Oddity" (Major Tom) by David Bowie . I think it's a Lincoln ad and it is also being played to death right now. (A little internet research has informed me that the song in the ad is Cat Power doing the cover.) I thought the song was fairly unique and deserving of its timeless place in the classic rock cannon. Now I consider it about as 'classic' as "Like A Rock" by Bob Seger.

Update about 5 minutes after I posted this: Not surprisingly, I just saw the Saved by Zero ad and it's for Toyota.

This is a disgrace

If I'm Dave Tippett, I'm yanking Marty Turco and demoting him to benchwarmer. Performance based demotion? Hell no (although I'm actually glad we have Raycroft and Budaj in comparison). It's those awful gold pads, glove and blocker. They are fucking hideous. He looks like he is the missing member of Sha-Na-Na. Texas hockey fans... lower your heads in shame.
Goodnight Sweethearts... it's time to go.

Quite the barnburner at Magness

Not my normal post fodder...but I've got to say tonight's DU victory over Wisconsin was some pretty prime hockey viewing.

On a night with rather bleak professional sports action, the Pios/Badgers did not disappoint when I settled into the easychair this evening, complete with a major DU comeback in the 3rd - which seemed mighty improbable; very compelling stuff. Hopefully DU will treat me to more of the same this year. They sure do like to throw the puck on net. (~50 shots on goal tonight!?!?!) That shit makes for some fun hockey to watch.

GMC Curse?

I don't know how the logistics go when it comes to hiring a regional spokesman for your commercials, but it seems a little odd that coach G gets denied again after both of his predecessors got the gig. And both coach q and h have been immoratalized in local commercial history around these parts. I mean how many times do you walk down the 16th street mall and hear some Mom yelling at her 3-year kid, 'And you just QUIT on me!!!!'. Or some suave bro-brah at 3-dog tell some drunk chick: It's time for a line change. I think coach G is up for the task of taking on these trendy one-liners.

So I guess what the title of this post is getting at, and what I'm getting at is ... is maybe it's GMC's fault. I mean they obviously have it out for coach G, and I'd kind of like to see the guy succeed. Nothing against Footer. I saw the commercial prolly like 4 times tonight, and I'll always be a fan of the feisty defenseman (although that delay of game penalty tongiht was quite costly), but GMC commercials are something he should do like 7 years from now when he's coaching in Hershey or wherever the farm teams are these days. In other words (i.e.), leave the GMC commercials to coaches. I direct that comment towards GMC only.

I know what all of you are thinking:

'Hey DT, give GMC a break! They lost their beloved radio show"

and to that I say: fair enough. I and other Av fans have also lost that radio show. Oh how I'll miss the hockey mom's who call in with their minor league sons ready to be called up by coach Q himself (by the way, I heard this delightful joke from some broad about a hockey mom and like... I think it was like alabradoodle or something). But I'm suggesting that maybe there is a correlation between the suckiness of these first 3 games, and Coach G not getting any GMC airtime. Huh? Whammy?

And I hearby declare KTH to be the first site to coin the phrse: "The Two Codys".

And I think we all can agree that Budaj kind of blows. Great 2nd period I guess, but can you put together 3 good periods?

I'm sorry for the rant, but the last 3 games have flat out sucked (Mudhoney would have put it a different way).

Stop Proving Me Right, Mr. Budaj

Two late-game choke jobs by the Avs. I'm not saying this is all Pete-B's fault, but that was a pretty weak winning goal tonight. Otherwise, he and the rest of the team had a pretty good night and looked like the better team. Still, zero points in two game thus far and a tough road game coming up against the Flames Tuesday night.

That said, I did enjoy watching my first hockey game of the season tonight, as I was quickly reminded that there are many likable players on this team. Just play a complete 60 minutes on Tuesday, fellas.

Sammy Would've Put More Pressure on the QB

Lots of griping going down at the TD HQ between Sonic Tooth, 30-Pack Thief and myself on why the B'cos couldn't get a win today and secure, or possibly pad their surprising AFC West lead today. Here are some highlights:

1) Our Defense Sucks

2) We Fumble Way Too Much

3) The Receiving Corps Is Decimated Right Now and Looks Like Arena League Quality Talent After B-Marsh

4) The Refs Jobbed Us On Two Big Calls

#1 above is the most troubling and glaring reason why even if we get to the playoffs, we would be ousted immediately.

Revelations

Let me be the first to say that I am so glad that hockey is back! Even though I am incredibly jaded and cynical I am always excited when October rolls around. Thanks to the Sonic Trout Death Bear family, more specifically Trout Dog, I was able to attend the opening night festivities against the Boston B's.
Now I could sit here and complain about how pathetic the Avalanche looked but then I would just elicit a whole bunch of "I told you so's" from Mr. Dog regarding the whole Theodore vs. Budaj debate we had at the end of the Stanley Cup Playoffs last year. Instead, I'm choosing to write about the stuff I've observed while attending sporting events. Are people really this stupid or am I an asshole?

1. Why, oh why, must Avalanche fans chant "Red Wings Suck!" when the Avalanche aren't playing against them? I'm going to admit that I think that performing this chant is stupid anyways. This is kind of like me going to the Great American Beer Festival, hoisting a few, then shouting "Merlot sucks, Merlot sucks, Merlot sucks!"
   
2. There is at least one in every section at Invesco Field at Mile High Stadium (There. I've done it. I've finally called it by it's paid given name.) At every Broncos game there is always some dumbass who stands up and looks back at the rest of the section in disgust for not cheering enough and then motions for everyone to stand up and make more noise. To these people I say: The Bronco Organization is not going to hire you in any official capacity so shut the fuck up!
3. I don't know what it is about soccer but without a doubt the best looking women I have ever seen at a sporting event was at a Rapids game. I think that Kronke should market this. It would definitely bolster attendance and it ALMOST made the game tolerable.
   
4. Why must everyone boo every offsides call at Avalanche games? They were offsides. It happens. Get over it.
   
5. The Broncos have officially named the fifth level at Invesco Field "Thunder, Colorado" The rest of you bitches have to sit in Denver, Colorado but my seats are in Thunder, Colorado. I know you bastards are jealous now. I'm going to run for the mayor of Thunder and my first official act will be to lower food and beer prices.
   
6. Somebody please explain to me the Rockies philosophy on team building. I'm going to say this for the last time. We need a Japanese player. What do the Dodgers, Red Sox, Rays and Phillies all have in common? That's right, a Japanese guy. If it helps I'll sit in the dugout until one can be found.
   
7. The only acceptable John Denver song (if any) that should be played at sporting events here is "Rocky Mountain High". Please stop playing "Thank God I'm a Country Boy" at once.
   
8. Is poker really a sport? Why does ESPN devote so much time towards it? This is embarrassing how pathetic my life has become that I'm rooting for poker players now.
   
9. Why can't beer be considered health food? It has water, grains and barley. Sounds like a liquid version of oatmeal to me.
   
10. I think that I can safely say that there is not one player on the Nuggets roster that I actually like. Thank god for hockey!
    

You can say I'm an asshole if you want. It's my wife's pet name for me.

Hockey anyone?

You know the puck drops at 8:00. Let the blogging start, eh.

Travis Henry

Say it ain't so Travis! Drugs? I would've never imagined that you'd stoop that low. I mean drugs? Seriously?

Broncos - Chiefs at Camaro-head....

The Chiefs have looked dreadful this season, but never underestimate the mojo that an entire stadium filled with guys on the right fueled on Milwaukee's Beast Light can generate.
I know this game is supposed to be a gimme for the Broncos, but for years when I sized up the schedule before the season began I generally considered the yearly trip to Arrowhead as a pretty reliable "L".

Hope this year is different...
Cutler and crew should be able to rack-up their now-usual loads of points. It sure would be nice if the D could step up and rattle whichever Arena Football League caliber QB they lineup today (Huard? Thigpen?) and deliver a decent performance.
Camaro-head be damned, these are not the Chargers or the Saints; time to silence at least some of the critics and play a solid game on both sides of the ball and bring home a victory from KC.

Elway, Say It Ain't So!!!

Received a "tip" today from my west coast sources that John Elway is engaged to a former Raiders cheerleader, Paige Green. Yes, that John Elway, and yes, those Oakland Raiders. Is nothing sacred in the world anymore? This is John Motherfucking Elway we're talking about. God knows he's got a longer leash than pretty much anyone out there about what he wants to do with himself in his post-football life. Arena football? Yet another reason Bon Jovi blows, but Elway, shit knock yourself out, dude. Never been to "Elways" restaurant, and I'm pretty sure it's full of pricks wearing mock turtlenecks and sport coats, but you gotta do something with yourself and why not be a restaurateur. I'll even let your republican allegiances slide, because you are John "Super Bowl 33 MVP" Elway.

But you got to have some principles and Johnny Boy, I dare say you've crossed the line with this latest stunt. You've showed up around town for the last few years making public appearances with a Coors Light in hand and various broads at your side, so why decide to marry a RAIDERS CHEERLEADER??!!?? Dude, stay in the closet with that shit!! What, is Al Davis going to be at your wedding? Is Howie Long going to make a toast during the reception?

Good god, I thought Favre sullied his legacy as a Packer by his recent shenanigans, but this my even trump that. Let's hope he comes to his senses before he goes through with this act of heresy.

ATP New York destroys ears, livers. (Sunday edition)

My Bloody Valentine
















Dinosaur Jr.

















Bob Mould

...and you will know us by the trail of dead

Best fest ever........................

ATP New York destroys ears, livers (Saturday edition)

Shellac











Polvo











Les Savy Fav

ATP New York destroys ears, livers. (Friday edition)

While I realize that Broncos season is in full swing (what a fine season it is so far) and the Avs puck drops on their preseason this evening, but in light of numerous music related posts in the past couple months I feel the need to throw up a few based on my recent trip out to the Catskills in New York to take in the All Tomorrow's Parties fest. It was a weekend of horseshoes, bocce ball, excessive drinking, and AMAZING music.




Built to Spill














Patton Oswalt














Meat Puppets
















On Friday also saw Tortoise and Thurston Moore but was either too lazy or forgetful to get the camera out for those shows.

Um, Thanks Again

I'm really glad we didn't lose this game to Martin. That little freak soccer guy really did us a favor by missing a pair of FGs, especially that one when the game was winding down and it seemed lost.

As great it is to be 3-0, this team has some pretty serious issues on D (and special teams). Get that shit figured out, or the 3-0 start won't mean a thing later in the year.

This just in, Brandon Marshall is good....

Uh, Thanks.

Yes, the donkeys probably shouldn't have won that game, with how lame they played in the 2nd half. Two critical calls go our way that pretty much lead to two of our touchdowns. Good, I'm glad. I'd be in a much worse mood if the refs and the hi-tech equipment were actually working properly. Cutler looks good yet again, but late game turnovers in the red-zone still seem to be an issue, which I believe was his main (and very deserving) criticism from last year. Tough to blame anyone for this (almost) blown game, but the entire D. As good as Cutler played yesterday, our D was making lame-ass Rivers and that newly fantasy football love-child RB look very unstoppable, especially in the 2nd Half. This division will definitely be won by either of these two teams: we all saw how back the Raiders were last week, and they were kind of making KC their bitch at KC during the morning round of games yesterday.

Hopefully this game will be a wakeup call for our D and remind Cutler the importance of taking care of the ball within the redzone.

And if you answered (b) in this week's poll, give yourself a pat on the back.

Anyone got a couple of these beauties in their collection?

Team Fined by League Office

In a decision handed down by NFL Commissioner Roger Goddel, the Denver Broncos have been fined an undisclosed amount for their failure to comply with league wide standards for hairstyle. During last night's first Raider possession in the Denver/Oakland game, the Broncos starting defensive backfield was being introduced by defensive tackle Elvis Dumervil when it became apparent that the Broncos had failed to field at least one corner or safety with dreadlocks.

Goddel was into his seventh cup of homemade mochachinos when the atrocity was noticed, "I spit out the last sip of that sweet, sweet coffee. Not only was I upset that I had to ask my assistant, Reuben to make me another cup, but I was just flat out angry at (Broncos' Coach) Mike Shanahan. I mean, don't we all love Al Harris?"

Goddel also used the infraction to speak about his disdain for the bizarre request that ESPN makes for every season opening Monday night.

"Don't get me wrong, I like the night life, I like to boogie. But, that sh*t didn't start until 11 o'clock here in New York."

The Broncos immediately contacted the San Francisco 49ers about requiring the services of Walt Harris.

Good Luck Tonight, Fellas....I'll Be Home Watching On TV

And likely having a few cold ones. Hopefully I don't decide to punch my TV or get in my car and do a little driving.

Like the rest of KTH, I'll be cheering for you B'cos!!!

Love, Brandon

Has you luggage been in your possession at all times...or were you approached by a skycap who looked suspiciously like Tatum Bell?

King Khan & His Nutty Ass Shrines....

DeathTruck and I took in yet another great show at the Larimer Lounge last night (been quite a slew of good shows there lately). We also took in quite a few Pabsts. Somehow the blurry camera phone quality is fitting to my state of mind at the show. What the hell, it was nothing but a big party anyway with KK in the hizzie!

Rumor has it that he will be back in November with that BBQ Show thingy. All hail the King!!

boom, out of here.

The people in the Nuggets front office are morons. Camby was the only one who could play defense or grab a rebound last season. Rafu-cap room.

The Brougham likes to rock

... and playing such hits as Colfax Crawl the Brougham Royale did indeed rock yesterday at the Larimer Lounge, kicking off their summer concert series. With ST, the sea-monkey, and manuel in attendance, it was a rather fun afternoon (with the high-life flowing like wine). There might still be a little brew in my system, so bring on that liver cleaning coffee.

I think I could speak for all of us, in that it'd be nice if the Brougham would play a little more frequently.

The two act that followed were pretty enjoyable as well. But personally, I'm just happy that the turbo knife fight chick didn't start singing right infront of me. I don't know if I could hang with her 'in your face' attitude.

On a side note, Alan just took a shit on my newly carpetted floor.

Imaad with Two Part Beast come to Denver...

...and rock the HiDive Wednesday night. Imaad as usual rules the world of electric guitar. Pretty mind boggling-- dude knows his way around a Fender Jazzmaster for certain, though would like to have seen more SG action.
Led off the show with Seventh Sign from the new record, and littered the set with some songs from his KRS solo record and (i think) even an alaska! song.

Quite a bit of drinking going on myself, but really can't compare to Bassist Bob, one half of the Beast. Dude showed up at the ST domicile at ~2am and promptly booted on the floor of the library. The wood floor was over due for some Murphy's Oil Soap treatment anyways, I guess. Nice casual morning hanging out with Imaad and Adam, as the Ive ran rampant, before they disembarked for the wilds of Nebraska. (Bob slept until rousted as the van was warming up, and now fully takes over from DT as most drunk post-rockshow in my house ever)

fluid is good one week later too...

...well, had been holding off on posting the one shitty pic I had from Friday's Fluid show at the Bluebird.

Sorta figured that TD might throw up a post/pic. But the ol' boy might have had a bit of a post-show hangover.

ahem.

That said, excellent show with a longer set than the Lounge show the previous Sunday. High energy.

John Robinson I believe is aging in reverse. Or he works out or something...

fluid is good

For a (somewhat) youngster, it was pretty cool seeing an old sub-pop show at the lounge yesterday afternoon (where the pitchers flow like wine). Kind of wish the set was longer, but the entertainment score was rather high. To put it in an Uncle Pot kind of way: 'I like it. I like it.' TD, I'm sure you'd also like to put in your 2 cents?

War KTH being a music blog until the first pre-season game
War Rocco (I guess he was in the WS of poker this last time)

Ian Likes Times New Viking

Hey, what's up, Ian? Haven't seen you in a while. You seem to be enjoying the show. I liked it to, but the Rockies game was better.

TNV brought the rock, but were way more of a "chick singer" band than their recent LP suggests. Probably not a fault in general, but I prefer dude singers unless your band name is the Pretenders. Still an enjoyable set fROMOHIO. Weird to be ignored by Ian so heavily.

Ok, upon further review, this guy doesn't look that much like Ian. But, my camera phone seemed incapable of getting a good photo of the band, thus necessitating the Ian-themed post.